Daily Disappointment! Yaaaaaaay!
For the last few weeks, I've been experiencing a healthy daily dose of disappointment at the office. Every day around 11am, I receive some information or have an exchange with someone in the office, that is by all standards deeply disappointing. Today it was being downgraded to yet a shittier monitor, which only goes to show that I am, indeed, Milton from Office Space.
I started off with a 23-inch Cinema display and a shiny new (at the time) Apple G4 with all the bells and whistles. I had a corner office with a window that looked out over Larchmont Blvd. On a clear day you could see the Hollywood sign right from my desk. It was a magical time. *sniffle*
Then a bunch of nasty political shit went down at my office, but in the end I thought I still came out on top because I had the option of working at home. So I started working at home, on our lovely iBook. It was grand. Except that my boss decided that after three years of loyalty and hard work, he no longer trusted me and felt uncomfortable with me working at home. So I went back into the office, only to be stuffed into the File Room - a room with one skylight that is full of dead insects, and no desk. Just a little ledge that runs along the side of a wall. Just me and the iBook, in the dark horrible file room.
Then there was the blueberry iMac. I started using the iMac as a second CD player, for when I had to identify duplicate songs or do stuff that I didn't want to bother the iBook with. I also used it for storage. But I hated every second of it. Every time I looked at its small non-flat display, its beady little speakers, its false sense of happiness pouring through the clear blue plastic like backed-up sewage spilling into a playground, a little piece of me died. It mocked me relentlessly.
Today, the saga continues as I get an even smaller, even shittier monitor. This thing must be at least 10 years old. I think it might have wooden panelling. It hurts my eyes. It fills me with hatred.
And the worst thing about it? There's a little icon in the menu bar in the upper right corner. This icon is for controlling your monitor. This icon is shaped like a 23-inch Cinema display.
I started off with a 23-inch Cinema display and a shiny new (at the time) Apple G4 with all the bells and whistles. I had a corner office with a window that looked out over Larchmont Blvd. On a clear day you could see the Hollywood sign right from my desk. It was a magical time. *sniffle*
Then a bunch of nasty political shit went down at my office, but in the end I thought I still came out on top because I had the option of working at home. So I started working at home, on our lovely iBook. It was grand. Except that my boss decided that after three years of loyalty and hard work, he no longer trusted me and felt uncomfortable with me working at home. So I went back into the office, only to be stuffed into the File Room - a room with one skylight that is full of dead insects, and no desk. Just a little ledge that runs along the side of a wall. Just me and the iBook, in the dark horrible file room.
Then there was the blueberry iMac. I started using the iMac as a second CD player, for when I had to identify duplicate songs or do stuff that I didn't want to bother the iBook with. I also used it for storage. But I hated every second of it. Every time I looked at its small non-flat display, its beady little speakers, its false sense of happiness pouring through the clear blue plastic like backed-up sewage spilling into a playground, a little piece of me died. It mocked me relentlessly.
Today, the saga continues as I get an even smaller, even shittier monitor. This thing must be at least 10 years old. I think it might have wooden panelling. It hurts my eyes. It fills me with hatred.
And the worst thing about it? There's a little icon in the menu bar in the upper right corner. This icon is for controlling your monitor. This icon is shaped like a 23-inch Cinema display.
posted by Myasorubka at 4:49 PM
5 Comments:
It's okay. You know what the Bible says? The part you don't read? It is easier for a camel to pass through a needle's eye than for a girl with a 23" Cinema display to enter the kingdom of Heaven. Only through suffering and misery and 15" CRT monitors shalt thou realize the virtues of... uh, something.
If you don't know what to have for lunch, eat your monitor.
Also -- this is a great time to focus (ahem) on your assignments. Because, and trust me on this, when bad stuff happens to you, the best cure is to write about worse stuff happening to other people.
my... um. my stapler... i must take my stapler with me...i gotta have my stapler... i'll burn this whole place down if i cant take my stapler....
That is quite disgusting. Your boss sounds like a geniune [redacted comment]
I look forward to when you slap your next bill from the eye doctor in front of his desk and say, "This is a work related incident on account of that blasted monitor. Pay for this and my glasses and my contact lenses please." Worker's comp is great.
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