Beer and Milk in the same night

Paraphrasing from an email to a buncha Russians...

I went to a client's show last week with a co-worker
and Tiago, my boyfriend. Before the show, we
were accosted by a guy who calls himself the Hair
Cowboy. He offers to cut your hair in a dark alley
behind the club. His claim to fame is cutting Kelly
Osbourne's hair and also he did an appearance on
Good Morning America.

The Hair Cowboy is this (rather hot) tallish gay guy
with pale brown skin and pale brown eyes and a
frighteningly persistent smile, and he was wearing
leather pants, a black shirt and a green fishing-type
vest in which he kept his various hair-cutting tools.
Sorta had the whole Lenny Kravitz rock star thing going
on. He had several piercings and tattoos, and on his
head was a cowboy hat. Oh yeah - and he wore a cape
(for cutting hair, eventually).

After we initially shook him off, my co-worker and I got
to thinking....it was only 20 bucks and would make a
great story. And we're both generally supporters of
guerrilla art. So we decided to do it after the
show.

We came out of the club after the show, and the Hair
Cowboy was nowhere to be found. We went all over the
block of Hollywood where he had approached us, asked
all sorts of bouncers and bums and bartenders, and
nobody knew where he was.

We gave up and parted our separate ways. My co-worker
went home and I was left with Tiago. Tiago and I, in
typical LA fashion, had arrived in separate cars, and
I had had enough beer to not want to drive home right
away. So we walked around for a while. We kept
walking until we came a cross a boho-riche-looking
cafe that was still open. We went in and got a large
latte to share and some little chocolate cookies. And
as we were scoping out couches on which to sit and
make out, who do we see but the Hair Cowboy!!

He was sitting and sleeping (I guess you can do both
at the same time) on a couch in the middle of the
cafe. We decided not to disturb him.

Tiago and I snagged an unoccupied couch, and after
several nail-bitingly exciting rounds of "try to guess
a person that you know and I know but you don't know
that I know", we decided to call it a night.

We were finishing off the last drops of our mutual
latte when someone walked into the cafe to talk to the
Hair Cowboy. The man left and the Hair Cowboy
finished waking up and got up to leave. When he
turned in our direction, he saw me and Tiago and
recognized us from earlier.

"We were looking for you, man!" I called out to him.

"I cut two heads tonight....this one Asian chick....it
was wild," he replied, some interesting combination of
uppers and downers twinkling in his eyes.

"You coulda cut three more. We were totally ready to
do it after the show," I waited for him to say
something since his mouth was sorta open. But he
didn't so I got nervous and kept talking. "But we'll
catch you next time. We go to that place a lot. And
I heard great things. About you." (lie)

The Hair Cowboy then muttered something unintelligable
about women and then started backing out of the cafe.
"...gotta go spread the vibes...and careful the dog is
sleeping so be quiet over there...."

Tiago and I smiled and waved, then turned to each
other hoping the other had understood any of the
sounds made by the Hair Cowboy. We both had no idea
what he said.

"Dog...huh??" I asked Tiago.

We trashed our paper cup and started walking out the
door. One backwards glance at the couch formerly
inhabited by the Hair Cowboy showed us that there was,
indeed, a dog and it was, indeed sleeping. I think it
was a Chihuahua. Tiny little thing with a fake fur
collar, wrapped up in a perfect ball, all alone on a
huge couch. As we approached it, it opened one eye,
decided we were not interesting enough, and went back
to sleep.

Anyway. Point of this story is that I had milk and
beer. Although I did not enjoy it so much the next morning...